The nice guy

I met a nice guy. He makes me laugh. He makes me feel wanted and comfortable. And even then when he is holding me in his arms I am thinking about you. He’s a nice guy. And all I can think about is you. The you that wanted to hide us. The you that was secretive and selective. The you that kept your feelings hidden so that you never had to deal with the repercussions. The coward that I fell in love with.


I’m not in love with you because I want to be so I don’t expect your pity. You infect me like a disease. Ripping through my body, infecting any good in your path. We belong to the people that we would bleed ourselves dry for. The people that are like acid in our veins. The people like you.


I don’t know what it was that me love you or what it was that made you hate me the way that you do. It was like one second you were there and one second you were gone and now nothing makes sense and I’m the one that is left alone. I’m here and I have no idea what I am meant to do with the guy that makes me feel like this because everything is connected to you.
How is it fair to let him hold me and take me when all I am thinking about is being with you. And all you think about is her. And I’m almost bled dry. God forgive me for what happens next.


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