Perks of Being a Wallflower

We accept the love we think we deserve. Yes I have been watching The Perks of Being a Wallflower. And I can’t seem to get this out of my head. The people who I have let love me have been anything but loving when it really comes down to it. And to be honest I think that is what I deserve. I have not done much good with my life but I have done a lot of bad so is it wrong to think that I deserve the love that I get?

When I was growing up I didn’t have a loving relationship with my parents. They would tuck us in and tell us that they loved us but I didn’t feel it. I guess when I saw other people with parents who would hug them when they were sad and look at them with those eyes that held so much love they could never feel alone, I didn’t have that. My parents weren’t cold but they were hard on us. We weren’t allowed to be sad about anything longer than five minutes and we were not able to show emotion other than happiness around them.

Maybe that is why I accept what I am given even though there is better out there. We accept the love we think we deserve. And I guess I do.

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